Its been a while...

I haven't blogged in a while. I don't know why; it just seems like summer comes and everything gets busy. I could go back and fill in the gaps, but I don't want to get bogged down in ancient history so I will just start from September...
Sept.6th Elizabeth left for Boot Camp (Army) in South Carolina. She was able to facebook from her cell for the first few days, but now- silence. We haven't been out of touch completely for this long since, well... birth!
Our dear old dog Harry Potter managed to hold on to see Elizabeth off then died within the hour.
With a newly empty house, school starting up again, days getting shorter and the summer weather turning cooler, you can really feel the fall approaching.
I have started to think about spending another long, dark, empty winter in this house. Now, don't get me wrong, I love our small cozy home, but I need something more in my life. So I was hoping to get a job. I  interviewed with a WorkForce agent. She explained to me that any payment I earned (even as a part timer) would directly influence my social security benefits, including my SSI, medical benefits and COPES (those are caregivers), so unless I am able to work full time (40hrs a week) it really wouldn't be worth the disruption. *Sigh* Well, I don't think I'm in a place where I can "support myself" I'm not able or interested in such an undertaking. Just wanted something to fill my days. I mean I have a Bachelors degree after all, I hate to let a good education go to waste! Maybe the high school needs a tutor (Ewww teenagers!) But who am I kidding, who will hire me... I'm nonverbal! With my limited communication, I wouldn't even be able to volunteer as a tutor. I guess I just need to embrace the abundance in my life (I have enough money, enough to eat, a warm home, a wonderful husband and lots of friends...). I was just hoping to find a way to give back to the universe.

A celebration of life, an event of death.

April 8th was Elizabeth's 17th birthday! She was at Job Corps in White swan, still, so John and I picked up her bff Monica and headed over the mountains for the weekend. We picked her up friday afternoon and back tracked into Toppenish in search of a sushi feast (Not easy to find 200 miles inland) Everybody had their fill and we drove back to settle in at the super 8. Next day we girls hit the Yakima valley mall. Some shopping, some snaps, lunch at applebee's with Daniel "a prospective squeeze", and we took in a movie, some girl /power film noir waste of time. The girls hadn't had enough but I went back to the hotel and waited for my friend Carrie and her husband and their 2 girls. They live in Richland, so Toppenish is not too far to drive for a pizza and a nice long visit. Everybody went home early; we new we had a long hall in front of us back to Whiteswan, then Seattle. All in all it was a fabulous weekend!

Poultry on parade

TTR
  

This is my latest addition to our happy family. TTR (Tony The Rooster), a beautiful little bantam for sure. I've never had a rooster. Originally we had 5 hens as a laying flock. They were sooo sweet, we brought them home at one day old and they lived in our kitchen in a cardboard box. Even the cats loved them! They outgrew their box and needed a new home, so John emptied the old smoke house, patched the holes and spread cedar chips on the floor. He and his friend Carl built an enclosed chicken run on the southern, sunny side, and the chickens moved in.

By the end of summer, the coyotes had discovered the smorgasbord and... a weakness in the fence!

Sweetie was our soul survivor. She is the biggest black chicken. But she was lonely! A friend of ours had an extra rooster she was trying to find a home for. Then another friend had four hens that needed a new home as well. Suddenly we had a full hen house again! They spent the winter getting to know each other and recuperating. Now here they are healthy and ready for another spring! I wonder who will be our first to set??

To boldly go where no-one has gone before.

When we first moved into this house, it was very small, dark and cramped- everything I, personally, don't like. Getting around in a wheelchair I generally find it easier to not have a lot of extra "stuff". Once we got the hard wood floor in and 90% of the furniture out, it was much easier to see what we were working with. The house itself is about 35' x 45' with two bedroom, 2 bathrooms. Once we took out a wall to expand the living room, it aloud a LOT more light with access to a third window. On the other side of the house, there was a small dinning area with a small window. We decided it was the PERFECT place for a sliding door, opening the house to the southern exposure! Like any remodeling project, once you start to open a wall, there can be unexpected... surprises. We ended up having an electrician divert all the wires in the house. TIME and MONEY! But once we got the door in...

I think it was worth it!

Now we have added a small porch outside, looking out over my garden... I'm in heaven!

Harry Potter

Aw... look at this face!! Can you believe the neighbor called the police on Harry? Apparently she felt a little threatened by the sweetest, cutest, friendliest, gentlest and most easy-going dog you ever met! This is Harry Potter, our seven yr old Border Collie/Lab mix. Pound rescue. So the weather is turning BEAUTIFUL here-65 degrees, sunny, low tide... what? Am I suppose to tie him up?! 

Recap

To begin, lets recap the last year...
John's mom passed away in November, leaving him her home. After some initial resistance, I conceded and we moved in in March.  "Moving" is quite a project! It took us nearly two months to empty every closet and drawer, throw out the oven, (which had mice living in it) clean EVERYTHING and give every room a fresh coat of paint..(Phew!!)

Just as we were finishing the inside, it was warming up and getting beautiful outside; it was time to tackle the yard! Harriette had been in-firmed toward the end of her life and hadn't spent much time outdoors in a decade- obviously.  Rusted out trailers, dead car bodies, old rusted bikes, broken chairs and mounds of refuse had to be cleared; weed-eating and slash-burning till John had blisters! I'm sooo proud of him, it looks beautiful! We will have a very nice spring this year.

Mark cutting out the wall

Super Dad lifting carpet!

 As the summer ended, we turned our attention back indoors. With my "nest" recently emptied (Elizabeth started Job Corps in Yakima Washington on September 7th), I was looking for a distraction.  We started on the remodeling projects we had been putting off. The first order of business was to pull out that nasty carpet and put in hard wood floors. We also needed to remove a wall and make the living room more spacious. We hired John's friend, Mark, who is a professional contractor and has been absolutely invaluable! Remodeling in November is quite a  juggling act. We had to pull carpet from each room one at a time, lay hard wood then move everything out of the next room, and repeat. At one point we were sleeping in the kitchen; then a few days later we were sleeping in the tv room! One freak winter blizzard and two major holidays later, we were FINALLY done with the floors.

Happy St Paddy's Day!!

Happy March everyone... I love March! Things are thawing and starting to grow in the back pasture, there is a coyote den with pups! I think I finally thought of a good theme for my blog. We recently celebrated our one year anniversary of living in this house, so I looked around and was amazed at all the changes we have made in a year! We got the little trailer on 2 1/2 acres of land in a pretty "used" state. It was sort of depressing to move into, but we were determined to make the best of it!  After a year of scratching around, we are starting to gain some noticeable headway. (Phew!!) I think my blog will follow the day to day struggle with remodeling, landscaping and otherwise renovating our new home.

Blogging

 The hardest part about blogging, I'm learning, it's not running out of things to write or even making time to journal every day. I can do that. I'm constantly writing in my mind, and I've found help physically typing. The REAL problem for me is actually being open enough to record my every thought and share them, for ANYONE to read! Blogging is so public, so immediate, so raw...  *shudder* the very THOUGHT makes me queasy!! I can take a lesson from my daughter, I guess. She blogs usually every day with rigorous honesty.  It's passionate, riveting, and fearless! Everybody loves it!! But only a 16-year-old could be THAT open.  Give it a few more years, and she might realize that the truth can sometimes whip around and bite you in the butt!   Sigh... Maybe I've been jaded by time. So I wonder, is my hesitation Wisdom or Cowardice?

Hong Kong

Well, since the decision was made about home ownership and future investments, I've been thinking a lot about what I should do with Grandma's money. I wanted to make sure it wasn't just... spent, that it had a lasting effect. At first I thought about making this land into an energy farm; setting up solar panels and wind turbines to harvest natural electricity and sell it back to the grid. This would be an extremely costly and long-term investment (not one that I would see the benefits of), and it would be dependent of the hope that whoever next inherited the property would value ecology as much as I do. I would hate to see the land divided up and the solar panels and wind turbines dismantled... that would be a bummer!

My Dad always said, "It's better to invest in yourself." So I thought, what would I want? Yes, I would love to save the planet, but I'm not really sure I have the right place for it. What I love, what I have always wanted to do, is travel... Travel all over, travel far away, see new things and see familiar things. People can be so different and so much the same at the same time!

John and I have gotten pretty good at traveling together. We practice often enough, going to Eastern Washington and then New Jersey and then Montreal and then the Eastern Caribbean...We are pretty good at land, sea and air! We have been traveling in wider and wider circles...So now where shall we go? So now we are off to Hong Kong! My friend, Irene, and her husband have lived there for five plus years. I can't wait to see them and their two kids! The more I think about it, the more excited I get!!

That's my girl!

From Elizabeth Salinas; "I love big words! Psychoanalysis and Rationcinate"

That's my girl! Lol!

Wake up call

Woke up to my text-alert sound at 6:30 am. (I am NEVER up that early!)

"I miss you."
Missin-podunk

So I replied, "I'm right here, Babe; what do you need?"

"Nothin'. Just my Mom."

Awww...

Temporary

I realize I haven't blogged for a while. Let me tell you what's been going on...

John and I have been remodeling. We came to a point where we were trying to decide on a back door. John wanted a traditional slider, while I prefer French doors (about three times more expensive-oops) When John started to raise a stink about the price on the French doors, then I thought, "Well, I've recently inherited some money, and this would be a great way to use it; Grandma would approve!"

Then it occurred to me that I thought of that kind of quickly. In my first marriage there was a lot of joint ownership to unravel. Who owned what, who owed what... I even had to share Elizabeth! It was ugly, and I swore I would never do that again. So when John and I decided to get married, for the sake of our family, we decided on a simple, non-traditional commitment ceremony. It seemed like the perfect solution... all of the commitment, public recognition, blending of experiences, without any of the legal hassle.

It seemed to work well for us... until lately. A little over a year ago, John's mom passed away, and he inherited her house and property. We decided to move in, make some changes and make a home for ourselves. It has been a fabulous year, but suddenly we are finding that our lives are blending to such a point that it is including our finances!

Before I bought a french door and in any other way, invested in the house, I wanted to make sure my investment would last, would be enjoyed and would be used. I wanted to make sure it was "our" house; a place where I belong and where I have some say. Grandma's money is the only thing that I've ever had in my life that is mine, and only mine... I could put it to use in this place and build something that is really important... or so I thought.

John and I discussed legality of the issue, and he flatly refused to make me a part owner in the place. I understand what he is doing, trying to keep that line between yours and mine. Also, land ownership would cancel any of my social security benefits. So practically it made sense. However, it still hurt my feelings.

Many a night he has been home late from whatever and of course I've imagined him lying in a ditch and it makes me wonder what would happen to me if he didn't come home one night. I believe his nephew is next in line to inherit this house, so in all practicality, I would be without a husband AND without a home... all in one fell swoop! So in wanting co-ownership, I was really trying to arrange some security for myself. God-willing, I did not ever want to be in the position where I was grieving for my husband and trying to find someplace else to live! But it wasn't meant to be. Security is a myth...

"Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. Security does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than exposure."
Helen Keller
U.S. Blind & deaf educator (1880-1968)

Do any of us really "own" anything? Can any of us really "own" a piece of the earth (What we call "property")?

"The Earth does not belong to us; We belong to the Earth".
Chief Seattle

Long story short, John is remodeling HIS house, I'm not involved. I'm just a glorified squatter... but aren't we all? So I wonder what I WILL do with Grandma's money? hmmmm...

In Tears

Last week, my daughter called me from school in Yakima (300 miles away) IN TEARS telling me she is having problems with her social life, and then went on to describe in depth the situation. She never specifically asked for my advice, but on the other hand, never really sought me out as a shoulder to cry on either. She would be the last to claim me as a "friend". So as I am listening to her, I find myself wondering what do you want me to say?. I don't really want to insert my opinion, obviously a delicate subject. I feel like I am walking on egg shells. We talked for about five minutes; I have tried to say something supportive, noncommittal. Then she hung up...

Three days later...I'm STILL wondering what was that about? Did I say the right thing? Did it help? How is she now? Is she alright?...*sigh*... Why do kids do that?

Welcome, 2011!!

ah-h-h, I LOVE NEW YEAR!! Not so much for the New Year's Eve party- I usually don't do much of
anything but go to bed early!- it's the newness of the year I find exciting. We were at the Seven Cedars Casino when 2011 started, with friends and fun. Then I spent the weekend cleansing the house. I smudged every room, packed away all the Christmas decorations... John emptied E's room and rip ped up the carpet in preparation to resume our remodeling... everything is feeling... optimistic... powerful... don't you feel the energy sizzling electrically?! I spent some time making lists and writing descriptions of future plans, hoping to focus some of this tangible current into reality. Maybe I should work on my l ayout for the garden.